Disturbed #1: Notions on insanity

Disturbed! will be a series of articles in which I will exploit my interest in the dark genres of literature, music, film, comics, manga and anime, audio productions and everything that you could possible imagine having a dark feeling attached to it.

Disturbed. Altered. Broken. Troubled. Bipolar. Nervous. Wrecked. All these notions can be attached to your person, when you are seeing life with a different applied perspective. Some call these things a path to mental illness, some call it their existential pattern, some call it art.

hqdefaultFrom the artistic perspective – the notion disturbed – creates an eerie dark atmosphere within a fictional environment where sad, sadistic, evil things happen. And when is the border between sick and art getting dissolved? I wonder myself sometimes, when I am watching something very gory and unsettling – what makes this of me if I enjoy it? Am I disturbed in some way, it is a sign that I am with half of my brain non-functional?

The answer depends on who is offering it. Some might say yes, some might say no. I really don’t think I am insane but I have a very dark side, a shadow growing inside me on a rocky temple of sadism. I like gory stuff, blood, death, pain, everything that takes you out of the ordinary and places you in a realm of despair. Therefore I seek these things. In art. In productions that make you doubt your own sanity.

I am a horror maniac. It is a daily ritual. At least one sick thing a day. If I’m not listening to some creepy melody I watch something or I read. It is in my nature. I was like that from a very young age. I remember as a kid I was fascinated with dark movies and stuff. I remember one time I knew about a horror movie with wild rabbits killing people to be broadcasted after midnight and I waited for my grandmother to fall asleep, pretending I was sleeping too and then I watched the movie…otherwise she wouldn’t let me see it :)).

There are tons of films, independent shorts, games, comics, manga volumes, anime series, podcasts where individuals like me can dwell in the sick pleasures of horror. It is a genre that captivates and seduces, a genre which can be very enjoyable or very unacceptable. Deals with fear, deals with the dark corners of the human psyche. Deals with everything that is beyond normal.

Like this thing I found on youtube today. Watch it at your own risk. It is sick and not easily digestible.

This weekend was relaxing. I saw Tag (Riaru Onigokko) – a Japanese horror movie from 2015 which deals with the perception of world through multiple personalities, a short disturbing film about some aliens called Mara Mattuschka, The Collector, The Bunny Game – movie about a psychopath that kidnaps a hooker and plays with her mind and both parts of Inner Depravity.

Took my dosage of what-the-fuck. šŸ˜€

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